Grief - A Place Beyond Words: December 1 - 7

I scheduled a date to spend time with my dear friend Isabelle this week. She died unexpectedly and peacefully in her sleep before we had a chance to get together. Usually I'm pretty good with words. I want to tell you what an amazing person my friend is. I want to share the mark she left on my heart and how much I miss her. Today, words fail me.

When I reach inside, there are no words. There are tears. This week, I'm trying to feel my feelings rather than push them aside. I invite you to do the same. Honor the tender, hurting places in your heart. Welcome grief and all it can teach you. Don't be in a rush to move on too quickly but acknowledge the depth of the loss. Love demands nothing less.

Practice

Mindfulness is not an aspirin to eliminate heartache, rather it is a lifelong practice. No magic words this week. All I know is looking away from the pain in life doesn't make it go away. The challenge is to make room for it, to recognize it, and to hold it with compassion.

Find a quiet place, light a candle, intentionally create a place of solace for your soul. Arrive just as you are and show up with your whole self. Make room for your joys and sorrows, everything beautiful and all of the ugly edges too. Welcome whatever is, just as it is.

No need to judge. No need to ignore. Can you simply be present? It might be helpful to name the thoughts or emotions as they appear. Worry. Fear. Planning. Numbness. Hope. Maybe there are no words for what you are feeling today. And that is ok too. Make room for the known and the unknown. Welcome whatever is, just as it is.

Let go of the stories. Let go of the resistance. Allow the unspoken to surface, as if watching a deer at the edge of a forest. Quietly allow everything to be. Remain in stillness as long as needed. Observe all that emerges in the clearing of your heart. Feel everything. Welcome whatever is, just as it is.

Enter into the rest of the day. Every now and then, place a hand on your heart. Remember compassion. Remember love. Welcome whatever is, just as it is.