Not Enough: May 5 - 11

Meditation can be freeing but along the way it might be scary. One never knows what will arise when creating a space for silence and stillness. Hidden fears and painful memories can surface unexpectedly. Learning to tap into one's resources is an important skill. In preparation for meditation, always remember to bring your resources with you. For me, that means literally grounding myself on the earth and remembering I am part of creation. It means taking in the beauty of the day and remembering all the gifts I have received. It is remembering to be aware of my breath and recognizing life itself as the first gift. It is remembering all the people who love me and knowing they will support me in difficult days. Now surrounded by nature, grace and love, I'm ready for whatever may appear.

Loneliness, boredom, past hurts, anger, and anxiety have all visited me at one time or another during meditation; however, one of my biggest insecurities is the fear I am not enough - not rich enough, not skinny enough, not smart enough, not caring enough, not brave enough. Learning to sit with my insecurities, looking at them, and not judging my lack is also an important skill. Meditation itself has become a powerful resource in befriending my inner fears.

Practice

Here's a poem I wrote not so long ago:

Enough

I long for a beach escape

but what if this moment is already enough?

I long for self-sufficient kids

but what if my loving family is already enough?

I long for a promotion and an empty inbox

but what if air and food and water is already enough?

I long for a runner's physique

but what if this body is already enough?

I long for silence and retreats

but what if my breath is already enough?

I long for enlightenment and visions

but what if this life is already enough?

I am always longing for this and that

but what if I am already enough?

This week make some time for quiet and then reflect on the experience. Acknowledge the good, the bad and the ugly. You could journal, write a poem, or share it with a friend.