For the longest time I thought of meditation and mindfulness as achieving a special state of unending bliss. I read stories of mystics who reached profound states of consciousness, could see into the future, inhabit dreams, and bilocate. I hungered for enlightenment, salvation, and transformation. If I am honest, I wanted to escape from being human and be transported to another realm. Maybe I still long for these supernatural experiences; however, none of this is the goal of mindfulness.
Mindfulness does not change me into something I am not but rather allows me to become more of who I already am. I don't leave my body, but through the body touch into the present moment. I don't transcend my thoughts and emotions, but through awareness experience life as it is happening right in front of me. I don't flee the world, ignore difficult relationships nor avoid suffering but rather discover the capacity to hold it all and keep on loving.
All of this is accomplished through the ordinariness of my life. No need to go to a cave, climb to the top of a high mountain, or go on a silent retreat. I'm discovering this radical change subtly takes place at the kitchen table, on walks with my dog, in the beauty of nature, and while sitting each day in stillness. So maybe I was wrong. These small and often unnoticed moments are where I'm changing from the inside out. Maybe it is magic after all.
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Practice
Hopefully you've been creating a habit of sitting over these weeks and months. Return to the spot you've sat in before, maybe in the place you've called home for years and years, surrounded by photos and mementoes you've collected over a lifetime. Settle into the familiarity of all of it. Settle into the breath, the one companion who has been with you every moment of every day. Imagine wrapping peace and security around you like a blanket. Dwell here for a while.
Now open the eyes of your heart and see with new eyes. Look at the walls as if entering this space for the first time. Remember how this place has shielded and protected you. Feel the warmth of the room, recall the special times and the everyday times. If these walls could talk, what would they say about your life? What transformations have they witnessed? How have you metamorphosed over the months and years? What alchemy has changed struggles and sorrows into wisdom and growth? What hidden dreams have yet to take root and grow into reality? It is in the quiet of the heart that true magic occurs.
Place your hand on your heart as you offer unspoken words. Trust in the power of love to heal and to make whole. Touch the mystery deep within. Know beyond thoughts and words, beyond time and space, that you are part of something much bigger than you. Sit in reverence and awe. Remain until this truth echoes in your bones and vibrates in your cells.Â